It is pretty amazing when you give a word of advice to someone and find that you’re actually talking to yourself. I know preachers experience that much more often than the rest of us. I can imagine how they must feel…almost every time!
But this post is not about advice, or preachers. We can get to that some other time (maybe?). Here’s what this is about:
Humans only see what they want to see. Simply put, perception is seeing yourself in others. We don’t see things as they are. We see things as we are.
I have been to that place where you just want to shut the door to everything — and everyone — that makes you feel uncomfortable. And I can say that it’s really easy to hate what you can not deal with, and put the weirdo tag on it because you can’t just wrap your fingers around it. You can only see people through your own eyes. I mean, I can’t think of anyone borrowing eyes from someone else to see.
Change the way you look at things and things you look at change.
– Wayne W. Dyer
I used to believe I was weird. And I tried a number of times to be “considerate” when dealing with people. I felt I was “too much to handle” and so, if I really liked a person I’d never start a meaningful conversation with first acknowledging that I was weird and that I didn’t want them to feel uncomfortable…now, that’s weird!
I was working my way to being a real weirdo without realizing it! It is true that I am quite different from a good number of folks around me but that should make things more beautiful, right?
There are people you just know of — no kidding — you know what goes on in their heads when your name is mentioned…and you know it is not nice.
Incredibly, there are still a lot of people who, no matter how good or humble you are, you will always be the bitch with the big “b”.
Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
– C.G. Jung
In a world where emotion is the publicly observable expression of perception, feeling is much more private. It craves human attention at any given time. It has a voice that almost always say — hey! Something’s missing. You just haven’t figured it out yet.
Part of the problem with the word ‘disabilities’ is that it immediately suggests an inability to see or hear or walk or do other things that many of us take for granted. But what of people who can’t feel? Or talk about their feelings? Or manage their feelings in constructive ways? What of people who aren’t able to form close and strong relationships? And people who cannot find fulfillment in their lives, or those who have lost hope, who live in disappointment and bitterness and find in life no joy, no love? These, it seems to me, are the real disabilities.
– Fred Rogers, The World According to Mister Rogers: Important Things to Remember
Unfreeze your heart, let her breath,
Let your fingers burn, put your hand in,
Open those eyes and let the tears spring,
The days are bad, the times are strict,
This ache and churn that make you cringe,
Is worth more, draw not away for ease.
Release your spirit, you need to live;
Smile through pain and hurt and love,
And cry out aloud when the cut is deep.
Let the ache and numbness sink;
This churn will only stay and pass,
And your blood will be the ink.
Here comes the dawn, bearing his gift;
A newness and a sweet bruise,
That knowing that there’s been a shift.
What happens when we don’t feel good about something, or someone? Are we to look the other way loath them for being what they are? Or should we make an effort to check within ourselves and deal with the the unpleasant feeling? How do we cope with the nausea of bleeding — literally — while trying to pass through the needle’s eye just so we can write a great piece, or even sing a song?
Stop and take a deep breath. Look and listen. The unease you feel most times, is an indication that there’s something you really need to fix. Taste the feeling and stay connected to it.
Feeling is a precious and increasingly scarce commodity in the world of art.